My Exhausting Weekend

Well, last friday.. my supervisor called me to "help him". He can't find any replacement to replace my colleague. And at that time, I was at the sch library doing E-marketing assignment. Hmm...it was 5pm. I had to reach the outlet at 6pm. I was rushing like hell. I was lucky to reach there in time. Hmm.. I was told to scoop i/c again..this time two person incharge of scooping the i/c. But then I helped out on the service. If there are a lot of orders then i go inside help my colleague. Wow, a lot of customers ar.. at about 9pm, i was inside scooping i/c.. and I was careless that I injured my left finger.. When I reached home, then i realised it was painful..it bleed but i didn't notice it. LOL!

On sat afternoon.. Gladys called me to pass her some notes. And, we met up to have a lunch.. She ate a little only..Ah yo yo.. ordered so much. haha! After tat, in the evening.. I helped my "old friend" to paint the room..I went to buy the paint first and cost 84 bucks.. expensive man. And I took the whole night to paint it. Everyone was sleeping.. 5am den reached home. Very tired.. but no choice 9am have to reach andy's house to do assignment.. and Sunday evening went to Kah Lun's birthday party... yup, he invited a lot of frends man..

The whole weekend I didn't have time to rest.. And most of all, thanks to Jueyi for the help in my marketing assignment. =) Long time didn't saw her..and "pai seh" ask her so many questions. Well, I'm going to finish this assignment.. next tuesday is my group presentation.

Right now, I had submit all my individual assingments.. Its time to prepare my examinations. And next friday, I going to relax myself before going to start studying..haha! Hmm.. I'm going to Malaysia near Malacca with my group members.. Andy, Jimmy and friends.. I believed it will be very fun as it is my first time goni to malaysia since 18yrs..haha! My mum brought me to Malaysia when i was a baby.. so i think.. this 2 days trip is "so called"my first time going there ba..haha! Take Care..

Harmonica

Last Weekend, I had a great time with my family members.. My dad, mum, elder brother and I went to Singapore Conference Hall to support my younger sister. She was performing harmonica for the 1st time. It was a grant concert.. there performers came from Hong Kong. Yup, she was nervous.. she looked cute.

The concert ended very nice with my fav song Tong Hua. After the concert, I congrats my sister and my brother and I bought a bouquet for her. haha! Well, then we went to Kallang Theatre there ate Taiwan Porridge.. long time we didn't have a family outing already.

I gotta buy a harmonica.. because I want to try learning to blow Tong Hua and others songs.. my sister can teach me, and she asked me to buy her a new set of instrument before she teach me.. Lol!
Take Care.

What Should I Do Now?

Well, I should just keep quiet. =) take care.

The only shot I took in the championship match. But I didn't score.. haiz! Wasted. 

I Will Fight Till The End. 

I'm the Winner

Finally.. My team, Mandai United had won the championship League Title after 3 years of participation. =) Well, the scoreline was 1 0. We scored in the first half and it was a very tough match.. the weather, pitch and of course our opponent. I didn't had the chance to be the starting eleven..however, I went in at the starting of second half. I prayed hard to win this match and also pray for myself not to injure during the match because I didn't wear shin guard. I created number of passes but was blocked by their defence. I try a shot but was far away from the goal. 20mins before full time.. the ball came to my foot.. I dribbled the ball from the left wing and I was confident to pass 3 defenders.. unluckily, after I passed them, I lost control and fall down. I went the ball went out of the line and I lay down on the pitch for a while. The pain kills me. ya, My right knee was bleeding. I continued to play despite the pain. I want to finish my task. I want to see my team win the champion.

Why I say I'm the winner?! After the match, I set down the shelter to rest..deep in thought. I discovered something. I had boost up my confident to face the reality of my life. If I say I can do it.. of course the chances is higher to achieve what I want. =) I also cannot believe myself that I can able to dribble past 3 defenders. Bing Jie! you are the man. Right now, my right knee is still hurt, its ok! I wanted what I want in this match.. as for my right knee, take good care will be alright after fews day. I almost wanted to cry.. can you imagine?! after the final whistle, it rains! It really a tough game.. yeah! next week, we will get our trophy. =)

After the match, I was alone. I went to Katong, near my god father's house there to eat my lunch..and then took the train to Andy's house. I have to recover soon prepare for the next friendly in two weeks time.. hope that my dad allowed me.haha!

I think, right now Sandra is very happy without my accompany..=) happy for her. She found her happiness..I miss her also don't dare to tell her..shhhhhhhhh. Take care.

Her Testimonial 20 June 2005

Hello..Sandra. Let me see, how do I begin?! Well, firstly, thanx for adding me as ur friend on 29 Dec 2004. She is a girl i've known since i was primary 1. However, she didn't reali knw who i am until i've re-introduced myself to her again. It has been a long time since I last met her. 8 years, finally I found her. Thanx for stepping into my life, I can say I'm a very lucky guy to meet her again at here. Hmm.. To me, she is different from other gals.. Friendly, Kind and Sincere to her friends. She is the girl who lights up my life. She is the girl who makes my life more meaningful. I'm glad she could meet up wif me even though she was busy in her stuff.. We have met up 75 times.. I hope tis number will increase as time goes by? if every step i take is a resemblance of how much I like you... i will be running forever...She is always special in my heart. Thanx
makeURL("Sandra! http://bingjie1.tripod.com(My ","eHNsL3VzZXIueHNs");
Sandra! http://bingjie1.tripod.com (My Story) is dedicated to you. Cheers..Take Care. =)

Goodbye

Well.. I see many couples everywhere. I feel it myself when I'm always alone. I experience a wonderful time with my ideal girl.. right now, not like last time. She is different now.. I caused it. I shouldn't fall in love with her.. I met her at a wrong time.. Why?! No one can answer me.. after 2day.. I will be alone again.. strive hard for my goals.. She has her own future.

Bing Jie don't cry anymore.. thanks and glad to meet her family and friends.. They given me happiness.. friendship is important.. they r all Uni students, I learnt alot from them.

Sorry, I've been very selfish.. hope I did for past 7 months had brought happiness to her. Thanks..I will always remember you. =) miss her smile and laughter.. miss the moment we were having meals together.. I have to say Goodbye to you. Stop myself to disturb you. Take care to all her family and friends..=)

This coming sunday.. I'm having an important match!!! I have to win the championship for the team..even though she not like last time.. wishing me good luck for the match. Well, its ok.. She is always special in my heart... A "virtual thoughts" that she wishing me good luck. =)

Sandra and her sister..together with 3 cute boy boy.. 

Thanks Sandra.. and those 3 cute boy boy..haha! 

nice photo..isit it?! haha.. yup, I had alot of fun with the kids at Boon Lay Fun Fair.. 

I'm a nobody (Always)

All along.. it was all nice story in my blog. It became memory. She has left me, she has went to a better life.. Zhi Wei. I will always remember..I'm the only guy I didn't bring happiness to her. She told before..Happiness Is Not Everything. However, I wll prove to her in the future who is the nicest guy beside her. If you love somebody set her free, I hope she will be happy always. I will always a phonecall away if she needs help.. guess, not really.. she got Zhi Wei.

Pray for her safety.. Miss her always. Take Care Sandra.. 2day is our 99times met up. Our story is always special.. =)

Even though I not "fit" to be your other half.. Hope that guy will treat you well. I'm looking forward to see who is her boyfriend.. respect him the most.


This coming Sunday..Championship Final match, I will prove everyone that what I did is truely from my heart.. I play all my heart in this game.. This match will also prove how serious I'm towards the things I did for her. Concentration, We can Win..if we believe ourselves.
Bye.

普通朋友

等待　我随时随地在等待　
做你感情上的依赖
我没有任何的疑问　
这是爱
我猜　你早就想要说明白　
我觉得自己好失败
从天堂掉落到深渊　
多无奈
我愿意改变 (what can I do)
重新再来一遍 (just give me chance)
我无法只是普通朋友　
感情已那么深　叫我怎么能放手
但你说 I only wanna be your friend 做个朋友
我在你心中只是 just a friend 不是情人
我感激你对我这样的坦白　
但我给你的爱暂时收不回来
So I 我不能只是 be your friend　
I just can't be your friend no,no,no,
我不能只是做你的朋友　
不能只是做普通朋友

My 1st time...

1st time with a girl for so long.. last time, relationship lasted less than 2 months.. I'm very lucky and happy to be with her even though she is not my gf.

1st time counting the times meeting up with her..(98 times), sending her home (67 times).

1st time staying overnight in a girl house.

1st time waiting for a girl to appear waited for 2 hours at the bus stop.. eating my dinner(fried rice at there).

1st time waiting just to say good night to her and waited 5 hours during midnight.

1st time feeling so lucky a girl treated me so good.

1st time with a girl, determination to study harder.

1st time went to ktv with her relatives and had alot of fun.

1st time even though i was very tired, as i heard her voice I feel there is an energy(just like a battery).

1st time bring a girl to let my mum see, had a meal in my house.

1st time during the first three days of Chinese New Year, I was with her.

1st time scare if a girl really leave me one day.. but have to accept it.

my 1st times...continue

My Life

Ya..it has been a long time since I last updated my blog. Well, this few weeks I was "multitasking" doing many things at one time. haha! studying for my tests, doing assignments, working.

Unhappy things happened between us. I don't know how to start writing about us now.

We used to be very happy when we are 2gether..(chatting, shopping, having meals). Now, i cannot stay closer to her even though i like her so much. Everytime, when I miss her.. i will take out my wallet to look at her photo. Sometimes, I'll juz get crazy and start talking to myself while starting at her photo. Nowadys, we don't get to chat on the phone that often..seldom meet up..(98 times).

Right now, tink she is having something on with this guy who she got to know through MSN. His name is called Zhi Wei and he's actually her cousin's friend... Its a long and amazing story of how they actually knew each other, rating 60% for Zhi Wei to be together, guess i dun wanna elaborate on the details... they have been chatting for quite sometimes and sandra said she is quite comfortable chatting with this guy. There's once I juz asked if she liked him.. She denied but i knew if they really got a chance to meet up, the probability of something really happening is rather inevitable. I juz stood there quietly, visualing the scene when she really does leave. Haiz, no choice but have to accept it. San always tell me that even if she really does has a bf, there's no need to be leaving each other. As in she still wanna be friends. I know she wanna be nice and be there for me when i need... But i know that my heart will ache more when i see her.. This is reality.

People keep telling me (You got chance to be with her de) . Haha.. everytime I just smiled back to my friends when they told me this. I totally lost the confident to start or even think about having a relationship. ya, its gd to say this because i can learn to love myself more and study hard at the same time. I guess if Sandra really has a boyfriend.. I'll really wanna see for myself who he is. i would respect and envy.. thinking how he is accepted by her.
Learn from others is the best. I will not go online(MSN) often because I dun wanna disturb her when she is talking to Zhi Wei or other guys. (Although she always tell me it dosen't affect her and i'm just being sensitive and jealous.) So guys out there, if got anytink juz call my hp.

Each time when i get to see her.. I'll feel extremely happy. I will look at her eyes sometimes.. and she didn't notice itat all..haha! You can say i'm crazy.. but if right now, I don look at her more..next time, I don have the chance already.

On friday, I went to her house.. and her mum is as friendly and approachable as usual. After a while i went home though she asked me to stay longer.. Deep in my heart, i wished i could be with her every min, every day... when i got up the bus, she called. she said that she was going to meet her sister at jurong point.. and she thought that I was still at the bus stop waiting for the bus. Without thinking, I juz alighted and ran back to her bus stop.. 1 bus stop away. I ran like a mad dog.. haha! I wasn't tired at all.. even though i didn't rest well tis few days.. the feeling was good when I was running back to find her again.. =) yup, tis is my memory.. I just want her to be happy.. It is very obivous that we are not together. I don't suit her at all.

Coming back to talk about Zhi Wei or other guys.. glad that she is happy when she told me.. she feel very comfortable and happy to chat with them. I don't knw what am i thinking nw.. Should I be happy to see her happy?! Or Should tell her what I really feel for her.. everyone is selfish! I should just let go.. no point forcing her to do the things she don't like. I will try to tell myself not to bother her... and luckily, I had kept a copy in a cd..all is about her. Before I know something is wrong with my com.. I quickly backup a file of her.. in a cd. Thanks Sandra. I won't deny the fact that I'm scared one day, I will not get to meet up with her again.. but I'm prepared for this..

Looking at her friendster.. I can see, she is happy with her life now. When the time she got a bf or even now.. she is still single, I have to delete the testimonial I wrote to her.. because I don want her future boyfriend to get mistaken.. let me be a 'nice guy" this time.. I think I will be leaving her soon.. without her by my side, I feel something missing in my life.. but I will learn to cope with it and prove to my parents wat I (Hong Bing Jie) can able to achieve next time.. I'm not a young kid anymore.. let's put relationship aside and concentrate on the goals I want to achieve. There's a barrier in front of me now.. Though Sandra always tell me that sometimes its good to actually step back and look at the other things around me, I know that it isn't possible.. I have no interest to meet up and know more girl friends.. Guess everything is counted on fate.. As for now, Single is the best.. I will be single..this is for sure.


I quitted soccer.. I disappointed my manager, coach and teammates. tis morning, I didn't go for the match.. I feel like I lost alot of things, something is juz stopping me from getting back the things i want.. my confident, passion and interest. Sandra will leave me in no time, no soccer. As for nw, I'm can only numb the pain I feel by staying busy to do all my assignments I have on hand. My life had changed. =(